Jessica Drew hates the dark. She wishes that, for once in her life, she could exist outside of the confines of shadows, in the warm comfort of the light. She does not miss the regimented life of being an Avenger, but she has to admit it was a lot easier being able to do what she needed to do with the full support of like-minded individuals. Mostly like-minded, anyway. In the shadows, every decision she makes could lead to the end of her freedom. There is no army of lawyers backing her up if she makes a mistake. Though, if Jennifer were here, she knew she'd at least have a little help there. In this world, though, she barely has Carol. When she is allowed out into the world, she moves from one point on the map of Jules Draper's existence to the next, keeping a weathered eye out for threats, but trying hard to keep her head down. And now that simple life, back and forth, has been threatened.

The time between, when she is merely something in the back of Jules's mind, she sees as much as Jules will let her. She understands things in flashes. She loses track of time. It is not unfamiliar. There is a memory deep inside her that begs to be forgotten, but she holds onto it the way some people hold onto their childhood diaries. It is not her earliest memory, but it is difficult to find a place for everything that happened in her life before this point. It is all fear and half-conscious processing in the dark. She is simultaneously blind and all-seeing. Her limbs feel too long, her bones heavier than she remembers. She is stronger than she remembers.

She emerged from a coffin at the age of seventeen and was immediately thrust into this. She was reincarnated and cracked open to give them space to fill her with dishonesty and too much power. Fear and vulnerability is so easily reshaped into anger and zealotry. Nick Fury pulled her apart again, opening the Pandora's box Hydra created and she wonders now what will have to fracture for Jules in order for all of this fall into place.

When she's allowed to see the world beyond Julianne's eyes, she assesses as quickly as she can. She sends alerts to suspicious vehicles or people, and she can feel the tension between her shoulders. Their shoulders. The separation is unclear and becoming fuzzier with every day. She can also feel the frustration that comes with that tension. Jules wants no part of this anxiety. Jessica can't see her time at home and she can only assume that it is filled with all the things that come with a new relationship. Missing that part is fine with Jessica. She can't allow herself to fall that deep in the well again. Loneliness is too variable. It is both weakness and power and Jessica has yet to find the best way to work it out. But when they are out, interacting with the world, Jessica wishes to be in control. To keep Jules safe. Them safe. All of them. Jessica knows that Jules possesses deeper powers that she has yet to experience or harness. Fear responses will be disastrous.

The last time Jules had to respond on her own, it had been the first time in a long time that Jessica had been terrified in a fight. She'd been locked away tight, nothing more than a voice, easily ignored or missed. The result left Jules wilted and scared. She retreated back into her own mind without a fight, and the only thing that will ever keep Jules on her feet through all of this is the fight. Healing is a power on its own, but whether what they share is a gift or a curse, it is there for the taking. Jessica wants to teach her this. To show her that fighting is the only way to keep hold of the person she is.

And then the day comes. The day in which she is supposed to reemerge. It has been brewing just as it does every month. Jules complains for days about the headache that splits Jessica's mind in half as well. It is the building thunderheads for the oncoming storm. Their early warning system. Then the moment passes-- no relief and all darkness, and Jessica knows that is where she is meant to be.